My Father

When I was in middle school a very sad thing happened, my parents got divorced. It may not seem like a big deal considering how many people get divorced these days in the United States. "50% percent of first marriages, 67% of second and 74% of third marriages end in divorce," according to Jennifer Baker of the Forest Institute of Professional Psychology in Springfield, Missouri. I have few friends whose families were not touched by divorce. But it was a huge deal for me and for my family, something none of us could have predicted just a few years ealier. My family was broken, destroyed and it took a long time for us to reform into new families. No one close to me made it out without what I considered to be, significant changes in their personalities.


Because of this divorce I was separated from my Dad, on and off, for considerable amounts of time. From the ages of 0-12 (approx) my Dad come home every night at dinner time. We all sat together around the table and talked about our day. Then my Sister and I, would grab a bowl of ice cream and sit on the couch with our Dad while he would read to us aloud. The Wizard of Oz, Ozma of Oz, all three Lord of the Rings, The Hobbit, Robin Hood, and most of the Harry Potter series are just a few of the chapter books that came to life from the voice of my Father. But then my parents started fighting. And I saw far less of him. I don't know why these things happen, I just know that it did. And the books on the coffee table went untouched for a long time. When my Dad was there, we did make an effort to read together, but it was hard because it was so infrequent. It may sound strange, but I was sad when I finished the Harry Potter series by myself. It felt weird and unsettling. 


Never the less, I kept reading and starting writing. Inspired by all the books we had read, their was no question in my mind what I wanted to eventually do as a career. I had known since I was probably 5 years old when my Dad decided it was time to start reading me chapter books, that I wanted to create the same things that I so much enjoyed. I wanted to be a writer. When my friends and I graduated from high school, so many of them didn't know what they wanted to do. I never had that problem. Communications and the study and practice of writing Literature became my focus in college and I've never regretted it.


It would be unkind not to mention that my Mother supported me every step of the way, because she most certainly did. However, it was my Father who read to me every night when I was a small child. It was through my father that I found the inspiration for my career. When I am an old women, no longer able to play rugby, have to put my dentures in to play my trumpet, and can't steady my hands enough to draw, I will still have my books. Perhaps I will have a daughter, granddaughter or niece that will again read to me aloud, bringing the pages of the stories I love to life.


I love my Father very much, and though we don't always share a lot of the same core beliefs, I know that we share a passion for knowledge and what is good and just in this world. So many of the books we read together reflected that message strongly. I don't think my Dad would care to hear that he a reason I believe in something higher, but I don't think he would be unhappy hearing that he is a reason I have hope and faith that there is goodness in the world, and good people.


This one is for my Daddy, and all the Daddies this Father's Day. Give your kids something positive and good to believe in because they believe in you!